The past: The Asics Kayano 11, the first top-of-the-line running shoes I ever purchased. I bought these in the spring of 2005, during training for my first marathon, and they carried me through all three marathons that I ran in the 11-month span from May 2005 to April 2006.

The present: The Asics Kayano 12, the successor to the previous shoes. I bought these to replace the old ones, as I was far past due. However, this also occurred just as I moved to Wichita, and saw my whole running life turn upside down. I gave up the sport for nearly three years, until I began running again in December 2008.

The future: The Asics Cumulus 10. During my most recent running, I started to develop serious shin pain, even after the initial start-up pains. This got so intense that I have been on about two weeks of (forced) rest to heal my shins. During this time, I reevaluated my choice of footwear, and through an intense analysis of my stride by some running experts, and careful examination of all choices available for my foot, I chose this new model to better suit my stride.

(For anyone interested, here's the breakdown: 1. My old shoes were too small, causing my feet to tense up and put extra pressure on my shins. 2. My old shoes provided massive arch support...which I do not need, due to my pronation tendencies and high arches. The extra arch support exacerbated my leg problems. 3. My shoes had aged for 3 years, causing the foam in the soles to harden up. 4. There were too stinkin' many miles on the old shoes!)

So, if you're a GR junkie (and I know you're out there!), this is the best explanation for my nearly-two-week hiatus from posting to this blog. I'll be back at it this weekend and next week, looking to make a mighty push toward the Bank of America River Run, where I will have my dad and many of my friends running 2 miles with me.

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Luke 9:21-24 (NIV, parenthesis added by me)

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There is a new 9:24 in my life these days. You're looking at it right here. The father of a possessed boy seeks healing from Jesus, and realizes that it's not that he doesn't believe in Jesus, it's that he suffers from the same fallen nature that the rest of humanity does. He acknowledges his unbelief, and asks for help to overcome this unbelief.

Doubt and unbelief are real emotions that take hold of us from time to time. But are they really signs that our faith is weak? I'd say this passage tells us that the opposite can be true if we simply realize that we, as humans, are prone to disbelief! We need help to continue believing what we know to be true, and that's that Jesus is capable of everything he says he can do.

In this passage, Jesus orders the demon from the boy's body immediately after the boy's father asks for help with his unbelief. 1 John 3:21-22 says, "Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him."

It is Jesus' desire to give me what I ask for. I need only approach him with confidence, and not with the debilitating self-doubt that the enemy continuously whispers into my heart.

It feels pretty freeing to rediscover this stuff today.

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Look at 'em go! 9 combined pounds lost for Shaun and Lindsay this week. As for me? I'm in neutral, and fighting off a slight leg injury that's had me on the shelf for about five days, minus the race--another vast improvement over my previous best time this year (over 2 minutes faster than my Shamrock Shuffle 5K performance). I'm not giving up. It's a long time until September!

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Pictured above is our crew that ran the races, left to right, back to front: Kevin, Brandon, Shane, Jennifer, Janel, myself, and Allen. Kevin, Brandon, and I ran the 10-K (I took 3rd amongst us!), and Shane, Allen, Jennifer, and Janel ran the 2-mile race. Jennifer and Janel both set personal records. Not pictured is Nathan Newby, who WON the 25-29 age group in the 10-K race. (His time was down in the low 30s.) I'm convinced he snuck away when it was time for the picture!

Great day for a run, and it was a blast hanging with all of the competitors.

I don't want to live one more day

Without your all-consuming passion inside of me.

I don't want to spend my whole life asking,

'What if I had given everything,

instead of going through the motions?'"

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Song: Matthew West, The Motions

From his album, Something to Say, © 2008 Sparrow Records

What is love when the emotion is gone?

The answer: it's a decision. This verse does not talk about a feeling. This verse talks about the things you do to demonstrate how you feel. It talks about obedience.

You see, the last few weeks have (privately) brought me such frustration that the last thing I have felt like doing is obeying. It's taken me places I didn't want to go, and made me ask questions that I did not want to ask. This verse even convicts me about how much I actually love the Lord.

I think of a scene from A Beautiful Mind, the brilliant film based on the life of Nobel Prize winner John Forbes Nash, played by Russell Crowe. His wife, Alicia, is played by Jennifer Connelly in the film. She goes for a walk with a friend and work associate of Dr. Nash, Richard Sol. John suffers from severe schizophrenia, and Sol checks up on how they're doing. The scene plays out like this:

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Sol: So, Alicia, how are you holding up?

Alicia: Well, the delusions have passed. They're saying with medication, and low-stress environment...

Sol: No...I mean, how are you?

(pause)

Alicia: I think often what I feel...is obligation. Or guilt, over wanting to leave. Rage...against John, against God. But...then I look at him, and I force myself to see the man that I married. And he becomes that man. He's transformed into someone that I love. And I'm transformed into someone that loves him. It's not all the time, but...it's enough.

Sol: I think John is a very lucky man, Alicia.

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I love this movie. It speaks of love more faithfully than most Hollywood films ever could. If you haven't seen it, I suggest you rent it, and watch the things Alicia sacrifices, and the things Alicia does for her love for her husband, Dr. Nash. Alicia shows us in this scene, that love is about more than feeling like it. Love is a decision, and sometimes, a transformation.

These days, I end up forcing myself to see Jesus as I once did, and honor Him with my actions. Then I'm transformed into someone that loves Him. It's not all the time, but...it's enough.

Bringing back the Bible verse: I decide to love Jesus, even when I don't feel like it, and so I will obey His commands. Period.

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It was a bit of an odd week for all of us. But it's a long contest!

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(Some content taken from A Beautiful Mind, © 2002 Universal Studios.)